By Katelyn Jackman
The popular definition of optimism, “seeing the glass half full,” can make it feel really hard to be optimistic right now. I’m not even going to go through the list of the reasons why it’s particularly difficult in 2020, because I’m sure you’re well-read on those topics. But you may, like many others, be asking yourself how, or why, you can be optimistic during a time like this. You might be thinking, “I’m just trying to be realistic,” as you indulge your pessimistic thoughts. I’m going to answer both of those questions and show you why being optimistic IS realistic.
What is Optimism REALLY?
First of all, “seeing the glass half full” can be a misleading definition of optimism. Let’s start with a better definition: Optimism is the ability and willingness to observe the entire inner landscape of thoughts, feelings, and perceptions (whether judged as positively or negatively), and choosing the perspective and subsequent action that maximizes one’s well-being. In other words, optimism is NOT ignoring or discrediting the bad or the hard stuff. Nor is it simply taking a “fake it till you make it” attitude. Rather, optimism is mindfully considering the information at hand, and choosing to handle it with an attitude that maximizes your well-being. That might be a little different than what you’re used to hearing, right? According to the popular definition, we would consider our peers who “always look on the bright side” to be the only true optimists. But, I promise that you can cultivate optimism, even during this difficult time!
How can I be optimistic?
Optimism is something that I personally have had to work at a lot. It can be pretty hard when your natural instinct is to pessimistically view a situation. The first step in cultivating optimism is to recognize when you are NOT being optimistic. Unfortunately, we can’t believe every thought that we have. Here are 2 principles that help me reframe pessimistic thoughts into optimistic ones.
1. Permanence: Optimists believe that bad events are temporary, whereas a pessimist believes that bad events last forever. I’ll give you an example of how to reframe a thought I had regarding COVID-19.
Pessimistic (permanent): “Being stuck at home in quarantine is the worst”
Optimistic (temporary): “Today it was tough being stuck at home all day”
See the difference? By recognizing that just today was difficult, I don’t process “bad” as a permanent feature of quarantine. Instead, I leave the possibility open that tomorrow will be better. I also did it realistically, right? My statement was not flowery or unrealistic, it was still completely honest. But, I still cultivated an optimistic mindset! Cool, right?
2. Pervasiveness: Optimists can keep their troubles separate from the rest of their lives. Pessimists catastrophize by blending it all together. Here’s another example.
Pessimistic (universal): “Online school sucks”
Optimistic (specific): “This class is particularly difficult in an online setting”
Again, in my optimistic statement, I didn’t sugar-coat anything. But I also didn’t let one difficult experience cloud my overall experience with online classes.
Learning to take an optimistic attitude takes time, patience, and mindfulness. As I said, optimism doesn’t mean we suppress negative thoughts and feelings. Instead, we learn to reframe our thoughts.
Why cultivate optimism?
There are so many benefits to cultivating optimism. Optimists are physically healthier—they have stronger immune systems and they engage in less reckless or risky behavior. Optimists have a better work ethic. They’re more likely to stick it out through challenges that pessimists might shy away from. Optimists feel better and are more resilient, they have broadened mental outlooks, and they tend to experience better outcomes. Optimists set goals and reach them.
So yeah, cultivating optimism is definitely worth it!
Where can I start?
At the end of the day, take a couple of minutes to write down some of the pessimistic thoughts you had throughout the day.
“My kids never put away their laundry.”
“Costco is always packed.”
“I am the worst student.”
Then take a minute to optimistically reframe those thoughts.
“My kids didn’t put their laundry away today.”
“There were a lot of people at Costco today.”
“I didn’t do as well on the final exam as I wanted to.”
Reframing your thinking is a great place to start!
There are so many resources on cultivating optimism. A lot of the content of this blog post came from the upcoming Optimism Module where we divulge a lot of those resources. Stay tuned to learn more about cultivating optimism, because the new module is coming soon!