By Camille Johnson
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
Everyone encounters grief at various points in their life, even though each person's circumstances are unique. Although grief is a universal experience, no one has quite figured out the best way to navigate through it. That's because grief is an impossibly complex response to losing someone or something you held in great value. In other words, grief – while painful – is necessary, and one of the cornerstones of being human.
While there’s no easy method for dispelling grief, there are a number of strategies that can allow you to grieve in a more healthy, productive manner. As you process your own loss, try to make use of the following grieving tips from My Best Self 101 that have helped so many others before.
1. Keep your friends close
Isolation can directly impact your ability to progress through grief productively. Turning to loved ones and close friends is a natural response to suffering. When that is not an option, the isolation can quickly exacerbate your loneliness, irritability, anxiety, confusion, and other side effects of grief.
We are all social beings, and being around other people is essential to maintaining our well-being. If possible, try to spend time with the most important people in your life in person. Maybe that means grabbing a coffee or lunch. Perhaps you invite someone over to sit with you as you cry at home.
Whatever you choose to do, prioritize your relationships because it will remind you that you are not alone. Grieving is complicated, and isolating yourself when you don't have to is unlikely to help you heal healthfully.
2. Engage in an activity you enjoy
While there will undoubtedly be times you don't feel like doing anything except sitting and thinking about your loss, try to find activities you can engage in to help you process your grief and move forward. Talking to others is a great place to start, but you might also find some exercises you enjoy that you can do from home or at a nearby park or fitness facility. Seniors often benefit from low-impact movements like walking, cycling, and swimming.
If you have a knack for art, consider picking up a hobby like drawing or painting, which can allow you to express your thoughts and emotions in a visual sense. Or make a point to dance or listen to music every day. These are also great ways to improve the overall feeling of positivity and wellness in your own home as well.
3. Learn to recognize your triggers
Each of us has situations or people that bring us stress. And the last thing you need while grieving is more stress. Learn to identify your stress triggers and hot spots so that you can take steps to minimize the anxiety in your daily life.
Maybe it's a particular person who gets you worked up or a circumstance that overwhelms you. Perhaps it's a specific place in town you should take care to avoid. As you learn your stress triggers, you will better understand how to manage your stress.
4. Try therapy
As easy as it is to retreat into ourselves while grieving, it's essential to seek an unbiased perspective from experts who can equip us with healthy coping methods. If your loss severely impacts your daily life, it might be time to pursue counseling.
Even if you feel like you are coping healthily, you can benefit from therapy because it can bring hidden issues to the surface. As you address those issues, it can help you progress through your grief. Find a professional whom you trust and are comfortable talking openly with. And give it time! If you don't want to go back after your first appointment, try to return for at least a few sessions.
5. Prioritize your sleep habits
Getting sleep can be challenging when you're grieving. But it is the only way you will move forward and function in your daily life. Be mindful of not eating any foods that can give you indigestion at night, and consider eliminating caffeine after lunch as it disrupts sleep cycles.
Also, make sure your bedroom has a restful atmosphere. Keeping it dark, cool, and quiet will help you fall asleep faster and stay asleep longer.
6. Eat nutritiously
There's nothing wrong with indulging in a comfort meal occasionally. But try to be conscious of your regular diet. Focus on foods that offer high nutritional value, such as lean proteins, healthy fats, fruits, vegetables, and nuts. Also, drink plenty of water — at least eight 8oz glasses each day. And be mindful of the empty calories you consume, such as chips, desserts, and soda.
7. Get a furry companion
If you don't already have a pet, now could be the perfect time to adopt or buy one. Four-legged companions can bring great comfort when struggling with loneliness or isolation. They can also leave us feeling happier and take our minds off the loss we experienced. And, of course, pets love their owners unconditionally.
If you get a dog, in particular, they will also encourage you to stay active. Many breeds require exercise, and you could make a daily habit of taking your pup for walks and playing with them in the backyard. As you move your body, your brain will produce more serotonin, benefiting your sleep habits, social interactions, and overall mood.
“Life seems sometimes like nothing more than a series of losses, from beginning to end. That’s the given. How you respond to those losses, what you make of what’s left, that’s the part you have to make up as you go.”
If you have recently suffered the loss of a spouse or someone else who meant a great deal to you, it's essential to take steps towards healing healthfully. Following the tips above will get you off to a great start, but keep researching any methods to help you process and progress through your grief. While there are no shortcuts, there are ways to find healing and joy in these difficult times.
My Best Self 101 is dedicated to the science and personal application of the "greatest hits" of positive psychology and mindfulness practices. If you have any questions, please reach out and we’ll get back