What if I told you that your very resistance of pain and discomfort might increase the amount of suffering that you experience long term? It’s true. Research has found that our unwillingness to remain in contact with distressing emotions (such as sadness, anger, loneliness, grief, etc.) intensifies negative psychological symptoms (Dindo et al., 2017). Sometimes, even psychological treatment can backfire if we try to use it as a means of escape from our tough feelings or expect it to take all the pain away.

So, I know what you’re thinking. “You’re crazy! You want me to feel bad?!” Well, sort of, yes, but mostly, no. The goal isn’t necessarily to enjoy feeling bad but to befriend your pain rather than resisting it.