Is Purpose “Found”?

It’s common to hear people talk about wanting to “find” their purpose (as if it’s hidden or buried somewhere and they just need to keep looking and digging). As is the case with our own happiness and well-being, purpose isn’t “found” as much as it is created. I think it’s most helpful to understand the “search” for purpose as a process of creating, choosing or defining our own purpose. Consider these words from Viktor Frankl:

“Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather he must recognize that it is he who is asked. In a word, each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible.”

To me, this means that we create purpose and meaning through our own intentions and actions. Purpose becomes the extrinsic manifestation (our patterns of behavior) of intrinsic wishes (our most authentic life aims). Purpose ensues from our own deepest desires. If there’s any “finding” of purpose, it’s simply the process of uncovering those deepest desires so that we can articulate them and regularly align our behaviors and goals with them. Your purpose is your answer to life. 

This means that your purpose is up to you! This can be a scary prospect; it would be much easier if our purpose was clearly defined for us or given to us by someone else. The struggle for purpose can create significant anxiety. It’s very common for a person to wonder, for example, “Is this my purpose? How will I know if I’ve really found my ‘true’ purpose?” First, if this process creates significant anxiety or distress for you, know that you’re not alone. Hang in there! The sections that follow will help you through this process. Researchers have studied the concept of “purpose anxiety,” and findings suggest that while the process can be very stressful, efforts at defining one’s purpose are ultimately very satisfying (Rainey, 2014). Further, I don’t think we should assume that we have just one golden, unchanging life purpose to “find” anyway. Our understanding, insights, and interests expand and change with life experience, and we need to leave room for growth in the purposes we define for ourselves. Different phases of life likely call for different emphases in our life aims. Knowing this helps us to be flexible in defining our purpose, and works against the thought that there is a single, transcendent, set-in-stone life purpose that we must find and pursue.

A related challenge is feeling like you can’t move forward until you have a clearly defined purpose. It’s even possible that one’s search for purpose becomes an impediment to worthy action. Don’t let the ongoing process of creating and defining your purpose become an excuse for inaction. You may find that purpose emerges as you take your best steps in the clearest meaningful direction you can see right now. You can even approach it as an experiment: start taking steps in the direction of an “experimental” purpose you’ve defined, and notice how it feels to be moving in that direction. What would it be like to live your life in this way? You can make refinements or course corrections based on how “alive” you feel as you experiment with living various components of purpose you’ve identified. Clarity of purpose may be more likely to follow action than to precede it.