By Bailey Gammell
We’ve all had good moments in our past that we look back on fondly—things like memorable sightseeing vacations, or perhaps the simple moments that make up a greater whole, like seeing a child smile or walking a scenic path in nature. Or maybe it’s not even a specific moment, but the mere memory of feeling the simple, quiet, joyful moments in your past. This action of looking back to positive memories is a form of savoring.
If you’ve checked out My Best Self 101’s savoring module, then you already know that savoring strategies can be split into three types: past, present, and future savoring. Present savoring is the primary type of savoring that the module focuses on; these savoring strategies often involve your immediate surroundings or daily life routines. Future savoring is the development of optimistic anticipation and excitement about the future. Finally, past savoring involves remembering positive moments and experiences from the past. Past savoring is a pretty important part of savoring, but from my own experiences of practicing savoring, I think there’s some misconceptions about it. Let me offer you an example.
So I love Disneyland, right? If you’ve been there as a child, chances are you feel the same way. Going back to Main Street, seeing the castle, and climbing aboard classic attractions probably elicits intense nostalgia for many others just as it does for me. Simply thinking about my memories at the Happiest Place on Earth provides me with an opportunity for profound savoring. However, the older I become, the more I feel things have changed. Becoming an adult comes with obligations such as paying the bills, working, and maintaining a level of responsibility and maturity. Childhood joys (such as Disneyland) seem to contradict this adult image. Society views nostalgic and reminiscent adults as immature individuals who refuse to take responsibility. Since growing up, I’ve felt more and more guilty for enjoying Disneyland—and many other joys from my past—due to societal push-back. However, after I practiced savoring and truly understood how and why it works, I completely changed my opinion on nostalgia. No amount of societal pressure will hamper the way I savor my past ever again.
If you can relate to feeling the same stigma affecting how you savor your past, I have some suggestions. My main suggestion would be: don’t forsake your nostalgic memories. Don’t avoid places or things that are associated with strong nostalgia. Just because the rose-tinted memories you hold may be romanticized (and not always fully accurate) doesn’t mean that those memories are any less important than things that bring you joy today! Here are some tips and insights about using nostalgic memories that will effectively elevate your experiences with savoring the past:
Never feel guilty for what brings you joy. You have as much of a right as anyone to be happy. As long as your savoring strategies aren’t hurting anyone, go for it!
Savoring past memories actually enhances those memories! If you experience a happy event, but never take the time to remember it or relive it, you’re shoving it out of your mind and treating it as though it never happened. Your happy memories deserve to be recollected in order for the experiences associated with them to be enhanced.
Past savoring is not the same as being stuck in the past or being immature. As long as you aren’t completely lost in the memories and are still living in the present, moments of joy from the past will bring you benefits into your present life which will actually improve your well-being.
Seek out triggers for happy memories. My favorite ways to do this are by perusing photo albums of past vacations and moments and by listening to highly nostalgic music. (Listening to the Disneyland Esplanade track is a favorite of mine!)
Recognize that, if you make living your life right not a priority, you’re creating nostalgic memories for the future. If you feel some sadness as you look back on your past memories and fear that your life today is not nearly as happy as it was years ago, stay hopeful. Savor the present and anticipate the good upcoming events as you savor the future. You will probably find yourself looking back to your present life events with pleasant nostalgia one day.
Nostalgia is the fuel for past savoring. While it’s also equally effective to reframe unpleasant past experiences in forms of coping, this should never come at the cost of forgetting the good moments of our past lives, for all memories shape who we are today. Remember that all memories deserve to be chronicled and recollected—especially the potent, positive ones.