values

You and Time: It’s Time to DTR

You and Time: It’s Time to DTR

In an age where casual flirting, situationships, and the phrase “I just don’t feel like we need to label ourselves” are becoming more common, there comes a point when it is necessary to DTR (define the relationship). Clarifying expectations and desires can allow a budding relationship to move to the next level—or break off if it’s not going anywhere. However, many of us have yet to effectively DTR with one of our most important and impactful relationships: our relationship with time. It’s no secret that time management issues are prevalent in our society today. Ever-increasing to-do lists combined with the sense that time is passing by faster than we can keep up are often a major source of stress and burnout. Add to that the constant pull of distractions, procrastination, and misplaced priorities… you get the idea. While it is difficult to know how to combat these struggles, author and journalist Oliver Burkeman believes that he has a solution, one that can reduce anxiety and promote feelings of contentment, purpose, and relief. In his book Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, he describes a new way to approach time and offers insights that are worth exploring. According to Burkeman, effectively defining our relationship with time begins with adjusting our expectations.

Navigating Physical Injury for an Engaged Life

Navigating Physical Injury for an Engaged Life

Dancing was my favorite social outlet and my go-to coping mechanism to combat stress or sadness; however, after my injury, I could not turn without my knee painfully giving out. I was devastated. To combat this life challenge, I decided to use the strategy of engaged living. Engaged living is the practice of identifying and living by personal values despite obstacles (Shearer & Warren, n.d). You may not be recovering from an injury like me; however, we all experience unexpected changes. When you experience obstacles or unplanned paths in your life, remember that you still have control to live by your values. The beauty of values is that they can apply to any situation. As you realign your actions to your values, satisfaction will follow. Engaged living is an effective strategy to cultivate happiness and overcome challenges. 

Joy in the Journey-A Cliché Gimmick or Powerful Words to Live By?

Joy in the Journey-A Cliché Gimmick or Powerful Words to Live By?

I was on my way to the Dominican Republic—a journey that required time away from my family, friends, and the privileged American lifestyle I was accustomed to. Over the course of the next year plus, I was expected to learn a new language, adapt to an entirely foreign culture, and take on a new persona. To put it mildly, I was terrified. Totally and utterly petrified.


While I nervously sat in the JFK Airport in New York during a layover, a quote on the wall written in big bold letters captured my attention. It read, “A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” I read over it a few times, trying to digest its implication and apply it to my particular situation. 

As cliché as it is, “finding joy in the journey” really is essential to your overall well-being. (Lyubomirsky, 2010). Huge life events don’t usually deliver the blast of joy we expect them to—and even if they do, it’s likely short-lived. (Harris, 2015). Additionally, these spurts of joy are so few and far between that we’d spend most of our lives in anticipation rather than enjoying the process.

Financial Security and Wellbeing

Financial Security and Wellbeing

Many of us can agree that monetary stressors, while are often not in the forefront of our everyday lives, are one of the enduring difficulties that we face. From the time we started saving our allowance for a cool toy, financial worries seem to continually reappear. “Financial peace” - a term popularized by Dave Ramsey in his first book—is something that many people seek. This being said, we can use simple financial adjustments to enhance our well-being in areas of optimism, supportive relationships, community, values and purpose.

Values and How to Honor Them

Values and How to Honor Them

When I was in elementary school, my classmates and I periodically received “virtue pencils”, which were those classic No. 2 pencils, but ones labeled with a virtue and its definition. One label I remember read something like this: “Courage: Doing Right When Afraid.” I suppose these pencils were an effort on our teachers’ part to instill in us values that we could hold dear to our hearts—values that would one day help us grow into exemplary adults.


One definition of values is: “words or qualities which describe the type of life you want to live” (Salazar et al., n.d.). As I got older and became an adult, I realized that just a few words like those written on my elementary school pencils can define what I choose to value in life.

Living by your Values > Living by your Goals

Living by your Values > Living by your Goals

Values are the deepest desires of your heart—they provide a scaffolding for how you want to interact with others, yourself, and the world in general. Values are typically described as one-word “core virtues” or “ethics” that capture what a person wants their life to be about. They are meant to provide meaningful direction and joy along the way instead of putting emphasis solely on the outcome. In short, defining your values, learning to effectively live them, and actively refining them can be ways out of the incessant future-based goals mentality that can bog down our daily efforts.

Finding Purpose in Your Career Decision

Finding Purpose in Your Career Decision

“Do what you love.” seems to be a piece of advice regularly given to college student decision makers—you know what I’m talking about. I’m sure your Uncle John was just telling you this at the annual family reunion. However, such advice is usually paired with the expectation that “what you love” is something prestigious, lucrative, and exciting. This counsel, rather than being helpful, might lead further questions to emerge in students’ minds: “What do I love?” “Is what I love going to make me a lot of money?” “Will what I enjoy be flexible enough to manage with my family?” The stress and indecisiveness remains. “What should I do?” continues to be the ever-prevalent question.

Overcoming Roadblocks with Values

Overcoming Roadblocks with Values

Remember how your values are like a compass? Just like how a compass has a north and south, some actions will direct you towards your values, and others will direct you away from your values. According to ACT made simple (Harris, 2019), “towards moves” are anything that brings you in the direction that aligns with your values. “Away moves” are any action that leads you away from your values. Away moves are going to be the biggest challenge of living a value-based lifestyle. The Engagement Module addresses toward and away moves really well, so I will only give a brief description of away moves here.