Have you ever walked from your parked car to the building where you work, take classes, or buy groceries without noticing the world around you? All too often, I walk on autopilot. Later, I realize that I was not aware of the beauty of the clouds in the sky, a tender blade of grass growing between the cracks in the sidewalk, or a golden tree covered in fall leaves. Too often, we miss the beauties of the natural world because we do not think to pay attention to them. Choosing to be aware of the wonders around us whenever we go outside enables us to have a deeper connection with the natural world
You and Time: It’s Time to DTR
In an age where casual flirting, situationships, and the phrase “I just don’t feel like we need to label ourselves” are becoming more common, there comes a point when it is necessary to DTR (define the relationship). Clarifying expectations and desires can allow a budding relationship to move to the next level—or break off if it’s not going anywhere. However, many of us have yet to effectively DTR with one of our most important and impactful relationships: our relationship with time. It’s no secret that time management issues are prevalent in our society today. Ever-increasing to-do lists combined with the sense that time is passing by faster than we can keep up are often a major source of stress and burnout. Add to that the constant pull of distractions, procrastination, and misplaced priorities… you get the idea. While it is difficult to know how to combat these struggles, author and journalist Oliver Burkeman believes that he has a solution, one that can reduce anxiety and promote feelings of contentment, purpose, and relief. In his book Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, he describes a new way to approach time and offers insights that are worth exploring. According to Burkeman, effectively defining our relationship with time begins with adjusting our expectations.
The Spotlight of Your Attention
When you go to the beach do you hear the ebb and flow of the ocean, see the sun reflecting off the swells, and the bubbly tide lapping at your feet? Or do you notice the sand getting in your shoes, the chaos of the waves churning and crashing, and the smell of seaweed and bird poop filling your nose? Both of them are there all the time, but what you decide to focus on will greatly affect your experience at the beach. Now say you are in the ocean, being tossed and turned by the waves, tumbled, unable to catch up to your friends swimming ahead of you. Where would your focus be then? There are many options: the frustration, exhaustion, and loneliness you feel, or recognition of your body’s ability to swim, the nice temperature of the water, and that you have friends to enjoy this day with. Where your attention is makes all the difference.
4 ways to face the transition to independence like a champ
Being a freshman in college opens up many new opportunities and experiences. You are finally on your own, and now are considered a full fledged member of the adult world, even if you don't feel like one. However, in many cases this transition into independence can seem more like a monstrous moth hatching when instead you were hoping for a beautiful butterfly. Research has shown that, “6% and 12% of transition-age youth, defined as young adults ages 16-25, struggle with a serious mental health condition.” (Fosbenner & Al-Mateen, 2019) Change is hard. Especially if you are just moving out from home and wanting to make your own place in this world. It can be scary, overwhelming, and exhausting. You have to work to pay for college, housing, groceries, bills, transportation, and so on. All while making sure to get good grades, and maintaining a social life. Which, don't even get me started on the stress of also juggling a love life. I would know, I am experiencing it first hand. However, I believe that even amongst this growing anxiety and problems we are all capable of rising above it and living a much happier/healthier life. It all comes down to these 4 key points that can make all the difference.
Yoga Pranayama: The Art of Breathing
Life can be tough, and at times, it can feel like too much to handle without healthy coping strategies. One of my personal go-to methods is simply pausing to take a breath. A deep, slow inhale and a long, heavy exhale always helps me take a step back and reconnect with my body. Breathing is invaluable for improving our well-being, especially when combined with practices like mindfulness, gratitude, savoring, self-compassion, and yoga. In the realm of yoga, this practice of breath control is referred to as pranayama. Also known as yogic breathing, it serves to deepen the connection between body and mind, furthering yoga's goal of unity.
Yoga: A Comparison Between Yoga and Mindfulness Practices
Recently in my yoga class, I've noticed numerous conceptual similarities between the practice of yoga and mindfulness meditation. As the teacher guides us through the session, it resembles the structured mindfulness meditations that I’ve grown to love. At the start of each class, she prompts us to introspect and decide on a focus for the day. Throughout the session, she directs our attention to our breath, synchronizing our inhales and exhales with our movements. When we engage in "binds" — positions where our limbs intertwine — we reflect on the symbolic binds within our minds that may impede our progress. Towards the end of every session, we recline into savasana, also known as corpse pose, and concentrate on clearing our minds, breathing deeply from the diaphragm, and scanning our bodies for any areas of tension.
Flow: Tara's Story
When I asked Tara what she loved about ballet, she told me, “I was good. I wasn’t as good as Gelsey Kirkland, but I was good. It was something I was able to have confidence that I could do and I knew I was good at it. I’ve never put that much effort into anything in my life.” Her relationship with ballet was clearly a very emotional and fulfilling one: one that gave her confidence in herself. She described ballet as an art that grounds you and connects you so deeply through your body that you can’t focus on anything else. In other words, Tara experienced flow through ballet.
Befriending Anxiety
Chronic stress, anxiety, burnout—these have been buzzwords the past couple years and much of the advice out there focuses on how to get rid of them. Personally, the past few years of grad school and starting a counseling career on top of the rest of my life have felt like a hurricane . . . I’ve tried avoiding, resisting, escaping, distracting, procrastinating—these don’t work for long, and often make it worse. And now I’m down to the last resort, this radical approach of not trying to make it go away—befriending the anxiety.
Savoring: Embracing The Goodness That Comes Your Way
At the end of the day, do you ever have a hard time thinking about what went well for you? Because life can be hard and unpredictable, it’s easy to dwell on what goes wrong within a day. As humans, we have something called a negativity bias. This hinders our recollection of positive experiences, which, according to research, seem to actually occur 3 times more frequently than negative experiences. The good news is that we can apply something called savoring . From the MBS 101 savoring module, “savoring involves mindful awareness of positive experiences to prolong and amplify their value.”
What Frustration Looks Like
In my experience, once I identified and described my frustration, I found that it no longer seemed so overwhelming or even real. In describing my emotion, I had to take a step back from my emotion and instead observe it with curiosity. I was no longer concerned with this tangible “thing” that I could see in my mind’s eye, and it no longer seemed overwhelming. If anything, it seemed like a particular zoo animal that I had paused to observe, but I was ready to move on to the next creature.