Basics of Self-Compassion

Basics of Self-Compassion

When you hear the word compassion, what do you think of? You may think of comforting a friend who is grieving the loss of a loved one, visiting an elderly neighbor who is lonely, or simply hugging your sister who just went through a difficult breakup. Most people understand the general concept of compassion, which is “the emotional experience of seeing another’s suffering and being moved to try to alleviate that suffering” (Hansen & Warren, n.d.). For most of us, when we see a loved one going through a difficult situation and experiencing painful emotions, our natural instinct is to want to help them in order to ease their pain. It’s hard to watch someone you care about suffer.

A Hard Life—The Good Life—A Sardinian's Life

A Hard Life—The Good Life—A Sardinian's Life

Within a few days of knowing Ivo, I began to realize what it really meant to live. Really living, it turns out, entails a lot more than kicking back and enjoying life. No, Ivo’s eyes and countenance painted a different picture than conventional media portrays in describing the island paradise, Sardinia. Granted, at a first glance, one might be tempted to think Sardinians live longer and happier simply thanks to the beautiful Mediterranean island they call home. (Fastame, 2022). But looks can be deceiving; the sweeping hills, lined with stone walls and crested by golden stalks of wheat, were not always such an endearing sight.

Positive Lexicography

Positive Lexicography

Language is a fascinating realm in which discoveries about culture and values can be made. In every language around the planet, there are unique words that only exist to that culture. Positive Lexicography, pioneered by positive psychologist Tim Lomas, PhD. in 2016, is the new study of seemingly untranslatable words that convey the meaning of well-being across various languages and cultures. By “untranslatable,” we mean that there is not a direct equivalent in English. These words can describe experiences unique to specific cultures or be concepts so important to the people that they have coined a direct term for it (Lomas, 2016).

Values and How to Honor Them

Values and How to Honor Them

When I was in elementary school, my classmates and I periodically received “virtue pencils”, which were those classic No. 2 pencils, but ones labeled with a virtue and its definition. One label I remember read something like this: “Courage: Doing Right When Afraid.” I suppose these pencils were an effort on our teachers’ part to instill in us values that we could hold dear to our hearts—values that would one day help us grow into exemplary adults.


One definition of values is: “words or qualities which describe the type of life you want to live” (Salazar et al., n.d.). As I got older and became an adult, I realized that just a few words like those written on my elementary school pencils can define what I choose to value in life.

Un-Disney-ing Our Relationships

Un-Disney-ing Our Relationships

By choosing to be in a relationship with another human being, you have chosen to experience conflict. Between differing parenting in childhood, adverse life experiences, and past dating experiences, even the most compatible people will have a stark contrast of opinions with something. Some researchers have found that lasting, healthy marriages have a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions—that is five positives for every one negative (Benson, 2022). Instead of hoping to avoid conflict for the rest of our lives, we should adopt a more positive view of conflict where we see it as an opportunity instead of a failure.

Being v. Doing

Being v. Doing

Tara Brach defines being as “when we’re not on our way somewhere else”. Being is a sense of connection and acceptance with what is and who you are in this moment, while over-doing might involve acting to change or improve something because you perceive yourself or your situation as unsatisfactory. Over-doing might serve to hide the parts about yourself you don’t like or to control or change others. And when we’re hiding from ourselves or trying to control others, we’re disconnected from ourselves and others.

Reaching One’s Potential Through Awe

Reaching One’s Potential Through Awe

Awe is an amazing emotion. It has the power to help someone reach their authentic self through self-transcendence. This experience of wonder can empower someone to have more motivation, feel connected with the world, have better psychological well-being, and so much more. Understanding one’s place in this large world can be crucial, and awe is a way to find the meaning of one’s life.

Healing Through Mindfulness

Healing Through Mindfulness

Have you ever experienced something difficult? Every person who ever reads this post should be able to answer that question with a resounding “YES”. Whether it’s unfairness in your job, a friend who let you down, or the loss of a loved one, we’ve all experienced a lot of good and a lot of hard. Thankfully, there are a plethora of positive psychology strategies and resources that can help you work through these difficult emotions. Today we will focus on mindfulness. Before you click away with the thought, “Haha! Nice try, but I know about mindfulness, and it just isn’t for me”, be patient. We will discuss what exactly mindfulness is, what it isn’t, and how it can help you!

Living by your Values > Living by your Goals

Living by your Values > Living by your Goals

Values are the deepest desires of your heart—they provide a scaffolding for how you want to interact with others, yourself, and the world in general. Values are typically described as one-word “core virtues” or “ethics” that capture what a person wants their life to be about. They are meant to provide meaningful direction and joy along the way instead of putting emphasis solely on the outcome. In short, defining your values, learning to effectively live them, and actively refining them can be ways out of the incessant future-based goals mentality that can bog down our daily efforts.